The lies we tell ourselves

by Kristie West June 20, 2021

I bought an exercise program a year ago. Actually it was 2 different programs. And it was 2 years ago, though I like to believe it was only 1. Health and nutrition are very important to me and I put a lot of time, energy, and money into these, especially since my daughter was born. […]

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Autumn and death

by Kristie West June 12, 2021

I’m a summer gal. Always have been. Winter is too damn cold. Spring and Autumn still aren’t quite warm enough. Summer is where it’s at for me. Give me a beach and summer clothes. But, in the area where we have lived for the last few months, I have grown to love Autumn. Not knowledge […]

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Procrastinating my pain…and guilt

by Kristie West May 31, 2021

I remember writing in the blog I did about Bonnie’s death that I knew it would potentially be easy to just drift away from the thought of her death an the feelings that accompany it. I wrote that, with the distance from her and not having her in our every day lives, it would be […]

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Looking at death, literally.

by Kristie West May 20, 2021

I’ve been reflecting, in the wake of Bonnie’s death, on how different some of my views around death are from when I was younger. Specifically for here and now, what I think about the need to spend time with the bodies of those we love who’ve died, and the rituals we have around this. Sitting […]

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Working through my own grief

by Kristie West May 17, 2021

For the first time in a few years I have some of my own grief to work though. I’m not so used to being on this side of the table. A dear and precious member of my family has died. My daughter and I lived in Bali for a couple of years. We left there […]

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by Kristie West May 12, 2021

It feels like it’s been a while since I’ve shared much about my own personal life here. I don’t know exactly why. Years ago I shared a lot of what was personal on here. But something changed…and I’m trying to figure that out as I write these words. Maybe I’ll learn the answer as you […]

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The stories that trap us and the stories that free us.

by Kristie West May 4, 2021

Often a young (or youngish) death is considered a tragedy. But what is far more tragic are the choices sometimes made by those left behind. I heard a very sad story recently. It’s not sad because it’s about a death. It’s sad because someone who didn’t die pretty much forfeited their own life in favour […]

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Unraveling the knot

by Kristie West April 21, 2021

Grief is like a knot. A tight, hard ball. Seemingly like a solid mass. But actually it’s made up of many different threads, all temporarily joined together. When you look at this huge knot it can feel infinite, insurmountable, permanent. But, just like any other knot, this is a knot that you have to separate […]

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What it takes to heal your grief

by Kristie West February 9, 2021

I’ve been reflecting this week on what I want to create this year and what it’s going to take. I don’t mean what are the particular steps I need to take. I mean the focus and attention and effort I need to put in. The step away from distraction and procrastination, and towards what I […]

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You can’t make their life or death more meaningful

by Kristie West February 1, 2021

There’s been a lot of death around me lately. Well that’s nothing new. And not just for me. If you’re paying attention there is death around you too. All the time. Always. (And no, not just in the past year. Any and every year). In this last month I’ve heard of a number of deaths […]

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