Looking at death, literally.

by Kristie West May 20, 2021

I’ve been reflecting, in the wake of Bonnie’s death, on how different some of my views around death are from when I was younger. Specifically for here and now, what I think about the need to spend time with the bodies of those we love who’ve died, and the rituals we have around this. Sitting […]

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Working through my own grief

by Kristie West May 17, 2021

For the first time in a few years I have some of my own grief to work though. I’m not so used to being on this side of the table. A dear and precious member of my family has died. My daughter and I lived in Bali for a couple of years. We left there […]

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Opening…

by Kristie West May 12, 2021

It feels like it’s been a while since I’ve shared much about my own personal life here. I don’t know exactly why. Years ago I shared a lot of what was personal on here. But something changed…and I’m trying to figure that out as I write these words. Maybe I’ll learn the answer as you […]

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The stories that trap us and the stories that free us.

by Kristie West May 4, 2021

Often a young (or youngish) death is considered a tragedy. But what is far more tragic are the choices sometimes made by those left behind. I heard a very sad story recently. It’s not sad because it’s about a death. It’s sad because someone who didn’t die pretty much forfeited their own life in favour […]

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Unraveling the knot

by Kristie West April 21, 2021

Grief is like a knot. A tight, hard ball. Seemingly like a solid mass. But actually it’s made up of many different threads, all temporarily joined together. When you look at this huge knot it can feel infinite, insurmountable, permanent. But, just like any other knot, this is a knot that you have to separate […]

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What it takes to heal your grief

by Kristie West February 9, 2021

I’ve been reflecting this week on what I want to create this year and what it’s going to take. I don’t mean what are the particular steps I need to take. I mean the focus and attention and effort I need to put in. The step away from distraction and procrastination, and towards what I […]

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You can’t make their life or death more meaningful

by Kristie West February 1, 2021

There’s been a lot of death around me lately. Well that’s nothing new. And not just for me. If you’re paying attention there is death around you too. All the time. Always. (And no, not just in the past year. Any and every year). In this last month I’ve heard of a number of deaths […]

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A recent short and sweet chat about death

by Kristie West January 25, 2021

Late last year I had a wonderful chat about death with Nichola Burton and Aly Cook on their podcast. It’s only about 20 minutes, so a quick and easy listen. You’ll find it here. Kristie xx

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How to stay in grief forever

by Kristie West December 9, 2020

Recently I received a facebook invite to a grief related page. I think it was an event, or a movie viewing…or something. I didn’t actually pay much attention, because as soon as I opened the page the very first sentence had me clicking immediately out and never going back. “Grief is the form love takes […]

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Will working on grief open up old wounds before it starts to heal?

by Kristie West November 16, 2020

In a word, yes. If you have a wound that hasn’t healed and you’ve covered it over with a whole bunch of bandaids, then, if you wish to heal it, you’re going to have to get the bandaids off to get to it. And when the air first touches it, yes it might hurt. It […]

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