Testimonials

What my clients have said about working with me

“I started following Kristie’s blogs after my Mum died in 2014 but it was only last year – a few years after my Dad’s death – that I built up the courage to start working on a one to one basis with her.  I realise now that I was holding onto my grief almost like a comfort blanket, but at the time I had convinced myself that the circumstances of my Dad’s death were so difficult that her GRIEF process would not work for me and that I would never be able to ‘move on’ nor feel the closeness I felt to him when he was alive.

Kristie’s approach is compassionate, empathic, challenging, and fun. ‘Fun’ might seem like an odd word to use in this context but Kristie has the ability to subvert everything you thought you knew and felt about life and death and I found myself really enjoying and looking forward to each session, never knowing where our discussions would go and what gifts they would lead to.  Kristie is very methodical and leaves no stone unturned, so we realised pretty early on that we needed to deal with my feelings around my Mum’s death as well as my Dad’s.  Having recently completed the process, I can now think about both of them and their deaths without pain; I can enjoy my memories but also look to the future without sadness.  Quite simply, I am healed and I am now as grateful for their deaths as I am for their lives.  As our work together progressed, I also found myself questioning other long-held beliefs and patterns of thinking – not just around death – and I continue to feel the positive impact of Kristie’s method in pretty much area of my life.

If you are considering working with Kristie then I would urge you to go for it; it is honestly one of the best investments of time and money I have ever made and I will be forever grateful! ”

“I started working with Kristie about 9 months after my mom passed away from cancer. By then, my acute pain was gone. However, I felt like I was under a heavy wet blanket of sadness and heaviness that I just couldn’t shake. I’d been my mom’s sole caregiver and inherited all the gifts that come with the job: guilt, regret, “shoulda, coulda, woulda” and a bit of PTSD. But worst of all, I couldn’t feel mom’s presence. As close as we were when she was alive, I’d expected to have a strong connection with her after she passed. But I didn’t. I felt nothing. Now that I’ve gone through the process with Kristie and feel mom strongly, I realize that I wasn’t feeling her not because she wasn’t there, but because I was in a place where she couldn’t reach me. My grief and sadness stopped me from feeling her presence. Now that all that has lifted and I feel joyful, I can feel her.

Another aspect of my grief was not even related to mom’s death, but her life. The last 25 years of her life, mom had schizophrenia. This disease tore apart our family and brought us all a lot of heartache. It was a tragedy. Or at least this is how I saw it when I started working with Kristie.

The magic of Kristie’s process is in the fact that it’s not about learning how to cope. It completely transforms the way you perceive an event or an emotion so there is nothing left with which you need to cope. Kristie didn’t leave a stone unturned. And she challenged some of my most dearly held assumptions which made me see things in a completely new light. As a result, I’ve come to see mom’s entire life, including her disease and her death, as a beautiful masterpiece, not a tragedy. And this is the greatest gift anybody could have given me.

Kristie is amazing, and I can’t recommend her highly enough. I always felt uplifted after our sessions. They were always positive and rewarding, no matter how heavy the subject. And after each session, I felt just a little bit better than I did before. Over time, these small changes added up to a completely new outlook on mom’s life and death.

And now when I think about mom, there is no sadness and there is no missing her. Instead, I feel joy and gratitude and I feel her presence. I know this is hard to believe when you are under that wet blanket of grief, but I am here to tell you it’s possible. Healing from grief doesn’t mean letting go of your loved one. It’s the exact opposite – it means removing the barrier that stands between you and them, so you can finally connect.”

-Olga

“In May 2014, my husband unexpectedly passed away.  He was 59 years old.

Suddenly the world changed.  My love, my best friend and life partner, the man I had adored for 34 years had gone.  Our two sons aged 28 and 26 had lost their father, their role model. The man who meant the world to them was no longer in their lives.

I wanted to die.  I had no meaning in my life.  I barely functioned.  Just getting out of bed each day filled me with terror.  The only part of each day I looked forward to was the end, when I could close my eyes and escape the pain.
I was left alone with a 50 acre property to manage.  I had no idea about anything …..not even how to get water.  It was an impossible task.  I was a teacher, a job I liked but there was no way I could return to my profession.
I had no direction, no meaning and absolutely no pleasure in my life.  I was frightened, miserable and felt so alone.
I realised that I needed help and reached out to several counsellors, psychologists and even a psychiatrist.
They had very little to offer me.  I was told by one that it would take me 12 years to get over this.(Where did the number 12 come from?)
It was suggested I also keep a journal, that I would learn to live with it and that gradually the pain would lessen.  This just didn’t make any sense to me.  I did not want my life to be this way so I continued my search and eventually came across Kristie’s website.
After we had spoken with each other, I agreed to give it a try.
There was work to be done and many tears were shed but I can honestly say, two days from the first anniversary of my husband’s death, my life is full of joy, love and gratitude.  Just as Kristie promised it would be.
As I look back, I cannot imagine I would be writing these words today.
I have returned to work and loving my job.  I have people in my life who love and support me.  I live on my 50 acre property surrounded by the beautiful memories of my husband.  I have gone from wanting to end my life, to living a most incredible life.

Kristie is a hero in the world of death.  She has a view on death that is not shared by many people yet it was her persistence, her passion and her knowingness that I would, at the end of her course, be living a life I never could have envisaged a year ago.  And she was right.

I can never thank her enough.”

-Debbie

“If you are reading this, then it’s likely that someone close to you has passed… and you would have a good reason for working with Kristie. I say, without a moment’s hesitation, please take it. Simply put, I can vouch for the fact that Kristie delivers just as she promises. After my father took his own life, it took me a while to begin the program, and having a tendency to some disorganisation, quite a while to finish it, and it is a result of Kristie’s commitment that I did. And I have no doubt she will show the same dedication to anyone under her wing.

As much as Kristie’s coaching helped me to deal with my particular grieving process, there are many other profound benefits, as when abstracted, it can actually apply to any loss of any description. Not only have I found peace with the death of my father, but I find I can now be far more helpful to others who have lost someone, and far more able to deal with the more trivial matters of life. This has turned what was apparently great negative into an equally great positive.  And just as Dr. Watson would say of Sherlock Holmes’ insights…  looking back, it all now seems so absurdly simple.”

– Patrick

“The love of my life died at a quarter to eight in the morning on 22 May 2013. We had been married for 38 years and before he got sick we had plans for our future, getting old together and fulfilling our dreams.

I knew he was dying for quite a while and I was sort of alright with that. We just got on with the day to day, the treatments, the operations, the good days, the better days, the difficult days and the really difficult days and nights. He never spoke about dying so I didn’t mention it either. I was also alright with that. I realise that we all do our lives in our own ways and that’s just how it is. We were always searching for a new solution that would make him better, we were always positive that there would be a good outcome.

The week following his death was a whirlwind of activity, arranging the funeral, letting people know and trying to keep my head together.

Then when it was all over the magnitude of his death hit me like a crushing juggernaut. I had fear or maybe it was terror, insomnia, panic attacks, crying, screaming and wailing. I was lethargic, inert, I didn’t want to eat, I didn’t want to get out of bed. I was broken and literally on my knees.

The experience of him dying was beyond anything I could have ever imagined, it was so much worse. I actually thought that I could not live without him physically in my life. I was done, you could say.

But, I am a very fortunate person. I have a family who loves me. Through their love and attention I survived this intense grief, because that is what it was. I started to wonder if there was a way to get better. I knew instinctively that I would not recover going the usual route of grief counselling. I had experienced a little of that with the kind and well meaning nurses.  So I Googled it, not sure what I put in the search. And I discovered Kristie West. Kristie promised 100% that I could get better and I believed her.

So we started to work together using her unique method. I began the course about three or four months after he died. I was in a mess, still crying a lot, still unable to make any sense of my life.  Through Kristie’s patience and persistence and my willingness to do the work I can say with confidence that today I feel better than I have felt in a very, very long time. As I write this, it is just over a year since he died.

I’m not altogether sure how I got to this place of lightness and joy. I know it wasn’t easy and it wasn’t quick. It took a decision, a commitment and it took some work. But I was guided every step of the way and one day it was done. I had come to the end of the hardest journey of my life.  Now I can enjoy each day free from fear, sadness and anxiety and follow my life’s course that changed direction the day he died. I can talk about him, his life and his death without tears.  I am grateful.”

– Josephine

“Before working with Kristie, the bottled down grief I had was bubbling up all over my life damaging my relationships, business and ability to connect with people. This beautiful process was so gentle, appreciative of my own beliefs and inner knowing and the true guidance I needed to settle into this change created by my dads dying. I always knew there was something more than the bullshit five stages of grief and that my dad wasn’t ‘gone’, just changed. Through working with Kristie I was finally able to move past the pain, suffering and be back in connection with myself, my family and my dad. I would really recommend Kristie’s course, even if the death was years ago. She is opening up greater possibilities than you ever thought possible and in a gentle caring way that isn’t soppy.

Thank you Kristie, your an amazing coach and truly the starter for an amazing new view point about death.”

-Rebecca Hulse – life coach and soul cravings expert – rebeccahulse.com

– Emma

“when starting the course I had no real expectation. The physical pain of my grief was so debilitating I spent most of the day just sleeping because my legs did not want to hold me up. I retreated from my normal routines of daily living, not wanting to bathe or eat. Making a drink hardly felt worth the effort. I did find the energy to support my Children and brother but away from this I was drained. As the course has gone on and with your gentle support I have done the homework I now see as the corner stones to the massive changes to the experience of my Mums death. I now see the Joy and the beauty in her death bringing us closer together and even more connected when I think of her in life and her death. I would never have dreamed this possible. My Mums legacy is now one she would have wanted, encompassing all of her and her life, the good and the bad of it in a truthful telling of her life.
The affirmation for me is that I can go forward in my life and embrace it fully with out being stuck in pain and grief which was so draining. It has also opened my eyes to how precious every second of every day is and how the present is the real gift in life. You are one amazing Lady Kristie and any one finding you and your G.R.I.E.F course are well blessed. Thankyou so much x”

-Amanda

“This work is amazing and groundbreaking. I am in a totally different place to where I was when I started the process and the course has fitted easily into daily life. I would wholeheartedly recommend this to anyone.”

-Elena

~Jean-Pierre De Villiers, The Reshape Coach  

http://www.jeanpierredevilliers.com                                                                                                                                                   

~ Dr Terry                                                                                                                                                                                        

http://drterry.com/

“Just been through Kristie West’s wonderful process around grieving and death, and I can’t sing her praises enough. She is truly a pioneer in an area that is still taboo in our society at large. What she inspires is an understanding of the beauty and perfection in something that is almost only seen as terrible, tragic and painful and helps the process of integration and healing with warmth, love, wisdom and laughter. She has such a gift to offer us all. Kristie, you really are a KPI and an expert in your field. I hope your business goes from strength to strength and I look forward to seeing a centre or a school of practitioners in your wonderful process!”

-Cindy

“My sister died around 18 months ago and up until working with Kristie I had been finding it very hard to deal with the immense amount of grief I was feeling around her loss. I had been having persistent morbid thoughts surrounding the final moments of my sister’s life, I was not sleeping & I had slipped into a pretty depressed state, which was going quickly into a downward spiral.  Previously I had gone through grief counselling which although somewhat helpful, I had found it to be more ‘comforting’ than ‘constructive’ and I did not come away feeling any better or with any way of moving forward.  Then someone referred me to Kristie and I am so grateful for that referral.  Working with Kristie gave me a whole new outlook on death and the grieving process. She has a unique, dynamic and refreshing way of exploring your attitude towards death and the meaning that you give to your loss. Very quickly, through Kristie’s process, I was able to search out the blessings in all aspects of my grief, even the most difficult or disturbing memories of my sister’s death.    When my sister died I felt that some of me died with her, but now I can honestly say that since working with Kristie that I feel like I have come back to life.   I am no longer depressed, I am much happier, I am moving forward with my life, I have renewed hope and I feel I have gained an immense amount of insight, strength and knowledge which I know I will be able to use, not only now, but when I encounter inevitable losses in my future. This to me is invaluable as, with all that I have learned from Kristie, I anticipate that I will be able to deal with future losses in a much healthier way and with a new perspective, thereby reducing the amount of suffering.  I would highly recommend Kristie to anyone. She is compassionate, outcome driven, very flexible with appointments (which was extremely helpful to me since I live in New York), sincere, passionate about her work, but most of all she gets results. “

~ Dina Eck

“I was referred to see Kristie this year following the most difficult period in my life.  My mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health was at rock bottom and I was desperate to move on.  Following a long illness my Mother died in May 2010.  A week after the funeral my husband Al was diagnosed terminally ill and his health deteriorated very quickly and after a few spells in hospital died in March 2011.  My marriage had been very rocky and difficult and his dying brought up all sorts of emotions – guilt, sorrow, relief and a whole host of other issues.  Working with Kristie balanced out these emotions and helped me see things as an entire picture, both good and bad and allowed me to love everything about him and move on as a spiritual being.   Kristie is a lovely, lovely warm and caring person.  The process leaves you feeling uplifted and positive and I immediately noticed changes in both my behaviour and health for the better.   I would strongly recommend seeing her as it will literally change your life. Allow yourself the freedom of letting go. ”           

~Margaret

 “I had the most phenomenal 4 hour session with  Kristie West less than 14 weeks after my father died. I thought I was doing really well, but was still having nightmares and overwhelming bouts of grief coming from nowhere, and guilt creeping out from the woodwork!!!  I now feel as if I have been under a warm, sparkly, refreshing waterfall, and emerged fresh, and with such clear energy and balance. I’m so grateful to Kristie for her extraordinary insights, and her process which allows things you dare not say, to be said. I feel so much more whole now, having not realised the enormous ramifications of my energy being dispersed in so many directions. My relationship with my beloved Papa feels more truthful and honouring than before, and the peace I have acquired has been priceless.  I cannot recommend Kristie’s work highly enough.”                                                                                                                                                                                    

~ Susie

“I didn’t think I needed Kristie’s services as I felt at peace with my father’s death 7 years ago. While speaking to her I realised that I had unresolved emotions around my relationship with him from before he passed away. As I shared this with her, she suggested we have a session to release that.   So we did.  And I am so grateful to Kristie for this! She took me places I would never have gone on my own, I felt held, seen and completely supported. She allowed me to see how every situation I had labelled as wrong had simultaneously given me great. All the labels fell away and I was left with huge gratitude towards my father for all that we have experienced together.  When I think of my dad now I have a warm glowing feeling inside like an inner smile. Even if you don’t think you need to see Kristie, go, you will feel grateful and thankful you did for the rest of your life.”

~ MH    

“My father passed away in 2000.  Before the session with Kristie I still had mixed emotions as it was 11 years after my father had passed away, and thinking about the time was still difficult to deal with. After the session with Kristie I felt positive about my feelings and for all the unanswered questions you have floating in your mind. 
Kristie is very easy to get on with, she listens to you and then guides you through all the questions and feelings you have. Then she gets you to answer your questions differently to let you gain a positive perception. She is very professional and skilled at what she does.”                                                                                                                                                    

~Ryan  

“My dad died when I was two, and while I grew up I learnt to suppress any feelings and emotions that would come up. I silently cried myself to sleep on many occasions and lived with the fantasy that if dad were here all my ‘problems’ would go away. In school I’d shy away from friends who would talk about their dads, and I eventually learnt to cope and get on with life. Some 26 years later, and without any warning, emotions were triggered at a wedding I attended.    I had no expectations going into the session with Kristie about what would happen.  For the first time in my life I had to ask and answer questions I’d never previously thought about. Kristie provided a space for me to explore these, and at the end of the session I made new distinctions and gained a new sense of meaning and insight. I always had the belief that ‘everything happens for a reason’, yet couldn’t previously find the reason.                                                                                      Thank you Kristie for freeing me from the story I was telling myself and for helping me uncover hidden chapters surrounding my dad’s death. ”                                                                                                                                                                                        

  ~ Mo

“It is my pleasure to give Kristie this testimonial of her wonderful work.  It has been a total privilege and invaluable to have benefited so much from her expertise. Her work has given me a different perspective of the loss of my dear husband, from a place where I was suffering acute heartache and loneliness to a level where instead, I could cherish the memory of our happy life together and with thankfulness.  Also, to have an awareness of the gifts his death has given me, such as the even closer bond I share with my family and friends and the will to make an independent life for myself as he would wish.” 

~Shirley

“Hi Kristie, I’m so much better thanks.  Much calmer and feeling more in control again, and happier! Thank you so much, between the session and your blog you really are a miracle worker.”                                                                                                          

~Celine

“It was really easy to work with you, you have an amazing way about you. I definitely feel you have been given a unique gift, the ability to quickly heal people who are grieving the loss of a loved one. You manage to put people at ease right away. It was a very positive experience, you allowed me to see so many things about my mother’s death which I hadn’t and couldn’t see before. In a brief conversation with you, I realised that I was still holding onto a lot of pain and grief around my mother’s death and especially guilt in not being there for her at the end. In one short session you were able to magically help me get closure and peace of mind. Subsequently I recommended that one of my mentees speak to you as she was really struggling to come to terms with the loss of one of her parents. She was blown away with your work and it helped her put things in perspective and move on with her life.”

~Gail  

“My mother was my whole world, she courageously fought cancer for three years. At the end she rested in peace. Before I saw Kristie my whole focus was on how she suffered, how I could not forgive people who could have helped her throughout her life. I also felt guilty that I did not do more to ease her pain and after her death I felt guilty about letting go of the grief thinking that it would dishonour her if I do. After seeing Kristie I realised that my mother died in the way that made her have everything she valued around her such as my love and the love and presence of my family around her. Now I feel more connected with my mother and much closer to her as she is always in my heart. Thank you Kristie”

 ~Dr S Alfadi   

“Kristie helped me through a particularly difficult period after I lost my father. Her ability to help me come to terms with, and accept his passing, has made it possible for me to feel like myself again. She has the gift of being able to help you work through your emotions in a pragmatic, sensible way that makes it easier to regain balance and perspective in your life. “

~Leah